Everybody wants to tell you how to write a book. It’s always been that way, of course. From high school English teachers who never published more than a couple of sappy poems, to helpful family members, to co-workers who only read Danielle Steel or Stephen King. Everyone has an opinion, and the moment you announce you want to write, they all come out of the woodwork with ‘helpful’ advice. Some of it’s good, much of it is bad, some is just downright confusing. What follows is just some of it.
“Only write what you know” – unless you’re a polymath, equally adept at politics, business, science and art – this is a poor idea. If you only write what you know, you may have some success in a very niche non-fiction market, but you’ll never write fiction.
“Write when you’re inspired” – good as far as it goes, but you’ll never finish anything. Professional writers write on a schedule, aiming for a daily word count. They keep their butt in the chair. Pros write when they’re inspired, when they’re not inspired, when they want to write, when they don’t want to write. They just write.
“Never start writing without an outline” – nonsense. There are legions of writers out there who call themselves ‘pantsers’, meaning they write by the seat of their pants. Many of them turn out very good books.
“Never use an outline” – equally bad advice. ‘Plotters’ (guess what they do) often feel that they can’t start a story until they know exactly how it ends. This also works well. Just don’t limit yourself on how you write, and don’t let anyone else limit you, either.
“Don’t use any adverbs/adjectives” – we covered this in my last blog on writing like Hemingway. If the word fits, and enhances the story, use it! Don’t overuse descriptive words, of course. Purple Prose is still bad.
“Write only for yourself” – sure, as long as you never intend to publish it. Writing without ever thinking of your audience is basically just stroking your own … ego. It may feel good, but it’s pointless. Writing snobs – those who want to be a writer as opposed to those who want to write – do this.
“Never change a word – you ruin the truth of the narrative” – yet another way to be a writing snob. Remember Hemingway’s edict: “The first draft of anything is shit.” Once you’ve finished the first draft, the real work begins – that of turning a rough manuscript into a solid, readable story. Again, think of your audience – someone else has to read the thing.
Some people will tell you to ignore grammar, some will insist that your grammar must be perfect. Some will tell you that a ‘perfect’ manuscript has to look a certain way, sound a certain way, use the ‘right’ words, follow a certain trend – all hogwash. There is no perfect script, no ‘best’ story format. You have to do what works for you, then edit the crap out of it. Literally.
YouTube has become especially bad about this kind of thing. Because the videos that get the most views and the most ‘likes’ are the ones that the algorithm rewards, the garbage piles up. Self-appointed ‘gurus’ put out mountains of trash, just to keep their numbers up. I understand, they’re just trying to earn a living. But the damage being done to young artists is painful, unconscionable and difficult to fix.
“13 Steps to Write Your First Novel” – uh huh. I think Somerset Maugham said it best: “There are three rules to writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.”
“My 12 Tips for Better Writing” – who are you? Why should I listen?
“Great Writing Advice from Famous Authors” – look, I collect quotes from various authors as well, but just because they’re famous or made lots of money with their books, doesn’t make them smarter than you. Look the stuff up yourself and copy off what sounds right.
“Writing Motivation…” – usually some kind of video made up of smash cuts from different movies about famous artists. Some of them are interesting, some are confusing, none of them contain any new or useful information. Watch when bored, or you need a little lift.
Avoid taking most of what you read or watch on this subject to heart. A lot of it is written and formatted by people who don’t know any more than you do about writing. As Ernest Hemingway put it: “All of us are apprentices in a trade where no one becomes a master.” The cold fact is, I don’t know any more about writing than you do, and neither did he. The only real, proven way to learn how to write is just to write. Write every day. Write as much as you can.
Don’t ever let anyone tell you what you can or shouldn’t write. Don’t let them tell you how to write, or when, or which type of writing is best. Never let anyone change what you’ve written, unless you can see that the writing will be better that way. Grammar is just a suggestion, sentence structure is just the most common way of doing it. Be careful, though – if you make your manuscript intentionally difficult to understand, very few people will bother to read it. And a very large part of the point of being a writer is to communicate ideas to other people. Don’t go out of your way to offend your audience. Shock them? Sure. Start them talking? Absolutely. Shake up their staid little worlds and get them to think? Isn’t that why you’re doing this? But don’t set out to be offensive. Be truthful – most people are instantly offended by the truth.
Go boldly forth into the darkness and light your way with your flaming pen. Then come back and tell us what you found.
Be well.
bcd